your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
