I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
