I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
