Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I want a musical about memes.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
