What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
We named our party play list daddy issues
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
