you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Randomize
