haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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