how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
