I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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