I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
