My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
