If i come over, it means nothing
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Last time i carry you out of a forest
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
