So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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