can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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