I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
