Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize