Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
and she was petting her beer can
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
