i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
