Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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