sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
