quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
