Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize