when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
