I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
