i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Randomize
