He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
