So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
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