Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
