Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Randomize
