We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize