Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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