She is in my trunk
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
