i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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