I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize