how can u be prego again
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Farmville is her only friend.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
