Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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