I feel great
I just peed on a car
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize