I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize