Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
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