I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
