Will you blow on my dice?
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
