Already got asked if we're dating
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Randomize
