He is an equal opportunity slut.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Randomize
