Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
