ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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