oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Success! We fucked roommates!
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