I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
My vagina is very pro this idea
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
