I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Randomize
