Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
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