Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize